Nerd Watch Wednesday: Halloween Havoc 1989

Dec 4, 201918 min read

Updated: Jun 3, 2020

First of all, a huge thanks to the nerds who came to my wedding and helped create such an amazing day for me and my wife Hannah. Second of all, a huge thank you to all the nerds who contributed to the buying of the wrestlingshouldbefun.com URL. Lastly, does anyone have any footage of Simon and Charlie taking that Christmas Tree bump???

Back to the true nerd matters at hand and this week, I had the pleasure of picking the nerd watch. I thought that the eighties needed a bit of love, so I plumped for a show from 1989 (arguably NWA's greatest in-ring year) in Halloween Havoc.

A little out of season, but that's me all over. I eat sprouts in June.

CAPTAIN MIKE ROTUNDA v THE Z MAN

By Rob Armstrong

I took one look at Z man and I knew he'd have died of something heart related. Lo and behold a rudimentary Wikipedia search revealed that the steroid-based mullet rack had indeed died of an enlarged heart. The ubiquitous wrestling tragedy strikes again. But if the great man were still around I'm sure he'd take great masculine solace in the fact that his legacy (to me) was how big his cock looked in those white trunks.

I didn't watch a lot of WCW, and a lot of that old school wrestling doesn't wash all that well with me. I know everyone thought it was real, but when was the last time you saw fourteen consecutive headlocks in a street fight? This is what this match was.

Which is why Z-man's cock was such a distraction. How couldn't I notice the fact it changed size and direction through the match when all that was there to distract me was some headlocks and the commentators DEFINITELY calling him "Sea-man". Why were people so easily impressed back in the old wrasslin' times?

8 minutes of headlocks is not impressive. I suppose Halloween 1989 is just before the Berlin wall came down which was meant to be a huge momentous thing, but anyone that's been to Berlin knows that it's actually only like 6 foot tall. Says it all really. If someone told those 1989 folk something was impressive, they'd believe it. Just like Z-man.

Z-man's fighting style was like the Berlin wall. However his wang was like people's perception of the Berlin wall. Captain Rotunda had two children. One is a jobber and one is a weird monster world champion guy. Neither of those are as big an achievement as Z-man's noodle. Give it up for Z-man's dick. Its alright.

RIP Z-man.

P.S. This match was boring.

Editor's Note - Just LOOK at Zenk trying to spit on the floor after winning! Fail.

WINNER - THE Z MAN BY BIG COCK ROLLTHROUGH

THE MIDNIGHT EXPRESS & DR DEATH v SAMOAN SWAT TEAM & SAMOAN SAVAGE

By Matt Brummitt

Apologies to all you big Dennis Condrey fans out there, but tonight we see my favourite version of the Midnight Express, Bobby Eaton & Stan Lane. This version of the team had, in my opinion, the best instalment of the Rock n Roll vs Midnight feud at WrestleWar 1990. However, if you want to watch one Midnight Express match, I’d dig out them vs The Young Pistols at Great American Bash ’90. You’ll never look at Tracy Smothers in the same way again.

As well as Eaton & Lane, we also get to enjoy Dr Death himself, Steve Williams. For the Attitude Era kids reading this, they will know Williams as the guy Vinnie Mac earmarked to win the Brawl For All tournament in 1998. After winning it, the supposed plan was for him to feud with the other IRL Steve Williams, the then champion Stone Cold Steve Austin. Instead he got KO’d by Bart Gunn & never got his mega push.

However, if this is all you know of Steve, you’re missing out. His 93-96 All Japan run was fantastic, having great single matches against all 4 Pillars Of Heaven. The best 2 are probably the back-to-back Misawa & Kobashi Triple Crown title matches in July & September 1994. Though if you want to see peak Dr Death in that period, I’d recommend digging out Steve & Johnny Ace (yep, John Laurinaitis!) against Kobashi & Misawa (4th March ’95) & then against Misawa & Akiyama (7th June ’96).

As for their opponents, The Samoan SWAT Team, despite having an absolutely badass name, I can’t really add a lot. I remember Fatu & Samu more as the Headshrinkers in WWF & “The Samoan Savage” as Tama who used to team with Haku back in the day. Fatu later became the Too Cooling, stinkfacing, “I DID IT FOR THE ROCK”-ing, Rikishi. Anyway, here we go…

The Midnight Express & Dr Death are out first and they are faces! This is weird. Cornette is swinging his racket to the crowd & people are cheering. Wut. I always remembered these lads as baddies but nevermind. SST out next doing some firedancing stuff. They get in the ring and start roaring at the crowd. Samoans go outside and are kicking off with the fans. The ref, who looks like Chris Roberts’ Dad manages to get them in control.

Even though all men are in the ring & the match hasn’t officially started, to keep order the ref is giving them a standing count to get back to their corners. That is some top level ref work right there. Fatu & Sweet Stan Lane to start the match. The crowd are hot. This should be fun.

After a bit of back & forth, Lane chucks Fatu out of the ring & the match dissolves again. Back in the ring, Lane starts on top & then tags in Beautiful Bobby (who is definitely not beautiful). Fatu uses an eye rake to his advantage & then tags in Tama (I’m using his WWF name as not writing out Samoan Savage every time & using either “Samoan” or, even worse, “Savage” will confuse everyone).

The SST advantage goes instantly as Bobby starts twatting everyone in the face. All 6 men get in the ring but Dad Roberts gives another standing count because he’s a boss. Tama goes for a corner splash which JR describes as a “high risk move” because this is 1989. He misses & the crowd goes mad. Dr Death tags in & clears house. His football tackle gets an insane pop. This crowd is nuts.

The commentary team plug Starrcade ’89 which gives me a rush of nostalgia as it was the first (legal) wrestling VHS that I owned. A mate of my Dad’s gave it to me in 1990 after watching his taped copy of WMVI. Anyway, back in the ring Fatu gets in another eye rake, this time on Dr Death. However, his joy is short lived after a reversed Irish Whip leads to a Dr Death clothesline. Another mega-pop. I wish someone loved me the way this Philly crowd love Dr Death.

He then doles out tackles on everyone! Including a 3 point stance tackle on Fatu. Bobby then comes into control things for a bit until we see Sweet Stan throw some of his sexy kicks (he used to be a karate instructor after all). Fatu eventually cuts him off & tags in Samu. Back kick and a nice standing dropkick from Samu. Lane fights back from underneath though & tags in Dr Death.

Williams has a back & forth with Samu ending with a heavy corner clothesline from Steve. He then tosses Samu into his own corner where Bobby punches him in the face. Williams hits a leg drop & tags Bobby in. He hits a flying clothesline on Samu & goes for the first pinfall of the match which only gets a 2.

Some nice back & forth goes the way of Bobby. Lane then tags in, as does Fatu. Lane starts well but Fatu catches him mid-air on a crossbody attempt and slams him. Bobby & Tama both tag in. Eaton fancies a running bulldog but Tama keeps hold of him mid-flight and drives him into the corner. Crowd did not like that. Tama chucks Bobby to the outside where Fatu & Samu drop him on the guardrail.

Eaton’s teammates help him for a while until the ref sends everyone back to their corners. In the melee, Fatu tosses Eaton onto the exposed concrete. Ouch. Eaton’s tossed back into the ring and, despite a couple of minor resurgences, takes a beating. A side slam from Fatu looks to have broken Bobby but Williams breaks up the subsequent pinfall.

The Eaton beatdown (Beatondown?) continues until Tama goes for a Vaderbomb & eats Eaton’s knees! He gets to his feet and it looks like Tama is going to cut off the tag but Bobby makes it with a dive! Springboard double axe handle (you read that right) from Dr Death!! Williams is wiping everyone out and at one point, Gorilla Presses Tama (who is fucking massive) & throws him at the other 2 guys!! That was ridiculous. Crowd goes mad & rightfully so.

Williams whips Tama & hits him with a powerslam! Goes for the pin but it’s broken up by Samu. Boo. Stan Lane is tagged in and hits something which looks a tad botched (I think Lane went for a DDT but Tama span like it was a neckbreaker). The match breaks down a bit & Lane hits an enzuigiri on Tama! The Big Kahuna gets on the apron to distract from the pinfall but Cornette wallops him with his tennis racket!

Whilst Lane is facing the commotion, Tama smashes him from behind, sending him careering into Cornette (& his racket). Tama goes for the quick pinfall which gets the 3! Boo!

Summary: The ending was a bit of a let-down but in all that was a lot of fun! The crowd were super hot & Dr Death was a tour de force! If you want to check out Dr Death & The Midnight Express for the first time, I’d maybe recommend the matches in my early paragraphs instead; but I don’t think you’ll be disappointed watching this encounter.

WINNERS - SAMOAN SWAT TEAM BY CORNETTE’S RACKET

WILDFIRE TOMMY RICH v THE CUBAN ASSASSIN

By JCH

The Cuban Assassin is in the ring. And as is the way things are in wrestling in America he is the heel. Waving the cuban flag gets him some good heat. Here comes Wildfire Tommy Rich to decent cheers to some funky bass playing.

Wildfire comes out all guns blazing before we settle down into some lovely arm drags into an armbar. There is a mild ‘Tommy Rich sucks’ chant from the crowd. Damn Smarks. Tommy Rich working the rest holds like a good babyface should. Literally he’s now on his 3rd long arm lock following an arm drag.

Cuban gets a short period of top. Its ended by……..an arm drag into a long arm lock. I hope the finish involves an arm submission. The Assassin has reversed the long arm lock from Rich into a long wristlock of his own. Is that a young Nick Patrick in there? In a crazy moment where they decide to not do armlocks, Cuban hits a pretty good KNEE TO THE FACE.

*Confirmed as Nick Patrick by the commentators. The crowd has absolutely died.

OH GET OUT. Tommy Rich just won with a Lou Thesz Press! Are you kidding, You can’t win with a Lou These press. Not even a flash pin. The press knocked him out. Didn’t even use the arm he worked for 85% of the match. I am done.

WINNER - WILDFIRE TOMMY RICH BY A LOU THESZ PRESS FML

NWA WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP: FABULOUS FREEBIRDS (C) v THE DYNAMIC DUDES

By Ross Casey

To say that the Dynamic Dudes are not over as babyfaces in Philly would be one hell of an understatement. The bleached blonde Johnny Ace and legally blonde Sean Douglas look like a tag team that would get booed out of Philly, to be fair. They look as threatening as me and my brother in our Teenage mutant Ninja Turtle tracksuits and skateboards when we were young.

Badstreet USA plays and the crowd pops big for the Freebirds. There’s chants of “Dudes sucks”. Poor Jim Ross and Bob Caudle are put in the position where they can’t actively admit that the babyface team is being booed out of the building. Ross does eventually admit that there’s “A few” Freebirds fans here tonight.

The match itself is actually a whole load of fun in my opinion. You have the charisma of Michael Hayes, fun selling from Garvin and actually decent wrestling from Ace and Douglas. The added crowd reactions due to Philly's hatred for skateboarders makes this more than watchable, too.

Out on the floor, Hayes clocks Ace and the Birds are in total control. Ace gets in some right hands, but Hayes hits a running clothesline in the corner and starts playing face for the crowd. They absolutely eat it up.

Garvin tags in, but the DDT doesn’t work - the crowd are furious a bleached blonde head isn't spiked into the mat. Shane gets the tag and lands double knees on Hayes to send him outside. An opening! Dudes look set to claim the titles, by hitting their double team slingshot belly to back suplex finisher, but Hayes hooks the foot though so Garvin can fall on Ace for the pin.

The Freebirds roll out of the ring having stolen one, but the crowd treat the victory with relish as the commentators try to put across the story that the dudes were cheated out of the titles. Oh, Philly!

WINNERS - STILL NWA TAG CHAMPS, THE FREEBIRDS BY UNDERHAND LEG WHOOPSIE

THE STEINER BROTHERS v DOOM

By Matt Connolly

So this week was one I was particularly excited for. I get to review The Steiner Brothers taking on DOOM. Two of the best tag teams of this era for my money, and I say that at a time when WWE was putting on 10 on 10 Tag Team Survivor matches. Imagine their roster had that depth now!

Steiners here probably a couple of years away from their peak but still in a time machine here doing things that would look dope today. I will say this review will be different to my usual as usually I watch the match and annotate as I go but due to time restraints I am going to brain vomit post match. Let's see how this turns out!

So the story for this one. Scott Steiner is fresh out of college and teaming with his brother "The Dog Faced Gremlin" Rick Steiner. This cute Lady starts becoming infatuated with Rick and it's just the cutest thing. The issue comes over time as the lady starts to become more sultry and less wholesome that she appeared before and this concerns Scott. Tension builds but The Steiners are racking up the W's so earn a title shot against The Freebirds at Clash of Champions 8. This is their first title shot - so a pretty big deal.

Anyway, it seems as if Scott was right all along as the Woman whom appears to want Rick's attention causes a miss communication between the brothers and The Freebirds are able to retain. Heartbreak. To make matters worse the Women in question turns her back on Rick and says that The Steiners are going to meet their "DOOM". See what she did there. So this is DOOM's debut. Also, she calls herself Woman. Original. Oh, and who is Woman? Well she is better known as Nancy Benoit and you know that story.

So who are DOOM? It's only Butch Reed and Ron Simmons. They both look absolutely huge in this period. Both were knocking around doing very little at this point so this team came at an opportune time. If you don't know these dudes wear masks. I'm guessing so it appears that it's two fresh dudes and there's no jobber stank on them. Great way to debut.

Things I liked in this match number one. Woman just screaming "Get them Steiners". Managers are such a staple of this era and they always make the matches better. The heat they generate from crowds is marvellous and Woman is no different. Thing two is the opening to this match. It starts in a big brawl between all four men just throwing bombs and ends with in stereo German suplexes from The Steiners that the crowd go bananas for.

This match had a lot of suplexes actually but that's only a good thing. I've always been a Scott Steiner fan because later Scott is just ridiculous but here I think it's fair to say Rick is further along in his development. DOOM are decent here but again they would hit their stride in the next year. One thing they do that is incredible is that Simmons hits a stunner! 1989 and wrestlers are hitting the stunner. Incredible scenes.

Overall though this match doesn't connect fully with me. I'm not sure why because I've watched these teams do fantastic things during this era. I think it was the way the match was blocked out. Babyfaces starting hot and being overturned is Tag Team 101 so that section works but The Steiners comeback is a carbon copy of their early offence. I know this isn't an era known for variety but running the same play twice is going to be diminishing returns.

So the finish. We get that powerslam and Frankensteiner that show that despite people sleeping on it Steiner was well ahead of the game in terms of moves. Camera misses most of it though. Poor form. Then it descends into shenanigans and DOOM use a foreign object that Woman introduces to grab that victory. This is a good match but it doesn't trouble any 5 star rating. Don't worry though because this era is filled with these two teams having barn burners with others dudes and themselves.

WINNERS - DOOM BY FOREIGN OBJECT MASK HEADBUTT

NWA US CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH: LEX LUGER (C) v FLYIN' BRIAN PILLMAN

By Ross Casey

OK. Full disclosure. I fucking loved this match and you should go out of your way to watch it. For most wrestling fans Lex Luger is the guy who rode around on the Lex Express for a month, hating children and life before failing to win the big one at Summerslam 93. Or that guy that drank a pint of milk at Wrestlemania 8.

Either way, history hasn't been kind to our Lex, and that is harsh when looking at his NWA run in my opinion. Heel Luger in 1989 was a fucking God amongst men. His stature, his mannerisms and his attitude were incredible here. Obviously, Philly had to ruin it by cheering him like a Road Warrior, but trust me, he is fabulous in this role.

The interview before the match is great too, Luger says that Pillman has impressed in exhibition matches, but this is the big stage now boy, with big money and he will wilt under the pressure of facing the Total Package.

Pillman is absolutely hyped for this match, pushing and shoving Luger, taking the champion by surprise, so Luger bails and leaves him to burn out. What a wise head. Luger can't catch the energetic former Bengal once back in the ring, so he offers a test of strength. Luger wins that one, which I love - we have already established that Pillman has the speed advantage and Luger the power.

Despite Philly cheering the heels all night, Luger is doing his best to get booed here. After tossing Pillman out of the ring, he tells the crowd to shut up and poses. He may even be trying too hard to turn the crowd to Pillman's side as he completely no sells the pain of an armbar at one point to have a slang with the crowd.

JR in 1989 is quick though, and saves it . y saying his hatred for the fans is blanking out the pain he must be feeling. The match is a brilliantly paced one, with the crowd invested throughout, and the finish comes when Luger sidesteps another high risk attack from Pillman and counters it into a slingshot onto the top rope. It looks devastating, with Pillman's neck snapping back.

Luger belligerently snaps his title out of the hands of the timekeeper and walks off into the night, probably to clean up at the local bars. What a guy. Loved this.

WINNER - STILL NWA US CHAMP, LEX LUGER BY SLINGSHOT

ROAD WARRIORS v THE SKYSCRAPERS

By RJF

So here we are, The Skyscrapers taking on the Road Warriors, who in this day and age would probably be called the Road Experience.The Scrapers out first accompanied by Teddy Long, quite the jazzy entrance music they have, classic 80’s. Now here come the Road Warriors accompanied by Paul Ellering. Huge ovation for this bunch.

They all square up in the ring, crowd still going nuts for the Warriors. Animal takes on Dangerous Dan to get this started. Hawk comes in and starts to work over Dan and after a few clashes in the middle of the ring he finally gets Dan off his feet.

Sid Vicious comes in and starts to get some offence in on Hawk but Hawk battles back and tags in Animal for the double team, they manage to get Sid down but he pops straight back up.

After more clashes with Sid not budging, Animal finally gets him down and out of the ring. Hawk tags back in and challenges Sid to a test of strength in the middle of the ring. Sid finally comes out on top and works Hawk to his knees. But what’s this, Hawk fights back and wins the test of strength!

After all four men duke it out in the ring, Dangerous Dan and Animal are the two legal men. Hawk tags back in and continues to work over Dan. Dan manages to get to the corner for the tag, here comes Sid who takes out Hawk in no time.

He picks up Hawk and hits him with a helicopter type move followed by a side slam for a 2 count. A huge close line from Hawk gives him a second or two for a breather before Sid is back up and kicks Hawk out of the ring.

Sid throws Hawk into the railings before bringing him back into the ring, Dan tags in and hits a huge Suplex before tagging Sid straight back in. Hawk is struggling here as Sid continues to work him over. Hawk tries to fight back with little joy. Dan tags back in.

The best down continues, Hawk gets the odd move in but it usually has no affect on Dan. He finally hits a Suplex on Dan but Dan is able to tag in Sid before Hawk can make the tag of his own. Sid continues to work over Hawk and gets him in a front face lock.

But what’s this? Hawk picks up Sid with the lock still applied... he makes his way to corner to finally tag in Animal! But the ref didn’t see it! Teddy Long was distracting the ref! Dan rags in, Hawk hits him with a big boot followed by a close line.

Hawk finally gets the hot tag on Animal! Animal takes down Dan and in comes Sid to disrupt things. Animal brawls with Sid as Hawk works on Dan. Now here come the Managers, Teddy has a giant metal key that he tosses to Dan, Dan smashes Animal with the key and the ref has seen enough and calls for the DQ.

The Road Warriors win this one, the Scrapers have still never been pinned but lose this match. Four giant men went to war in this one. An ending that protects all men. This feud is likely to continue. Lovely stuff.

WINNERS - ROAD WARRIORS BY DQ

THUNDERDOME MATCH: THE FOUR HORSEMEN v J-TEX CORPORATION

By Pete Hitchcock

Flair is Flair. Sting’s promo is utter crap but he’s so fired up it doesn’t matter. Funk also puts over what we’re gonna see. They’re talking about how cool an electric cage is rather than saying they are gonna murder each other, which isn’t a good sign. Flair out first with about as low key a Flair entrance can go. Nice to hear the win condition - Ole Anderson or Gary Hart has to throw the towel in. Nice twist on the submission rules for War Games. Oh and Sammartino is the ref! Good pick.

I think the video skips and they’re all in the ring now. The bell rings and Flair and Funk start out, it’s pretty basic to start, chops and slams by Flair on Funk. Sting tags in and he’s hot too, just attacking Funk like a dog. Big fan of 89 Jim Ross on commentary, he’s so much faster than the JR people know, like a horse racing commentator or something. JR gets in a dig at ‘sports entertainment’. Was that phrase around this long? Sting military presses Muta into Funk and Flair tags in and his hair looks unfortunately enough like Jimmy Savile now, it’s flying off to the sides. He needs to get some blood in there!

Muta and Funk get the heat though and yeah I forgot how much young Mutoh ruled, he’s so fast. One of the best at reinventing himself, every so often. Sting and Flair get control again and Sting gets a big reaction when he goes for the Scorpion Deathlock. They’re doing a good job with him ahead of next year’s big win, it feels like. Flair and Funk fight it out on the cage fence for a bit while Sting and Muta give it a go on the other side. Muta gets sparked from going too high, and now Funk is really trying to get up there himself. This is a bit weird, I guess the aim is that being in there with Flair and Sting hurts more than a shock but the commentary don’t call it out. JR!

Funk’s managed to get himself incredibly tangled up in the cage for a second and now I know where Foley got some of his tangled up spots from. Flair has really sliced up Muta with chops in this match, it’s been quite one sided and now Flair gets the Figure Four on for a bit. Stay tuned on Mutoh and the Figure Four... or listen to the Puro Pourri Podcast episodes about the UWFI invasion!

All the stuff on the other side of the ring has allowed Muta to get Flair in the Muta Lock now and you’ve got to think Ole is going to throw the towel in soon as Sting pleads with him not to while he’s tied up in the cage. Funk even hits him with the famous piledriver that started the feud! Good callback.

Sting gets free and swings in on a rope! He should have a machine gun too, he kinda looks like Arnie or something. Maybe grenades. Flair back on offence and heading right after Funk’s leg this time. Absolute scenes at the end as Flair gets Funk in the Figure Four and Sting repeatedly splashes Funk from the top rope, you can see Flair loosening the hold as Sting comes down and slapping it back on afterwards in a really nice touch.

Muta attacks Bruno and gets laid out and I think Gary Hart throws in the towel? That was kinda unclear actually. It sets up the famous I Quit match really nicely as Funk never actually submitted himself, which is a really great match if you haven’t seen, but you probably have. I liked this in principle but it did not need the bells and whistles and all the razzmatazz, this would have been a really good straight wrestling match that they could have done the same finish for and it would have been much more memorable.

Hopefully AEW keep it back to basics for Fury Road.

WINNERS - THE FOUR HORSEMEN BY GARY HART TOWEL THROW