This week it was Simon's pick for our match and he went for a bonafide classic of Edge & Christian v The Hardys v The Dudleys! Let's get to it!
Ross - We good?
James - Don't want you moaning about spoilers if I'm a second ahead Ross!
Dom - Spoilers, dick.
Ross - Fetish Hardy get up.
Pete - Mines playing.
Simon – Ok, I’m playing.
Ross - Oooh Heyman on commentary!
Pete - This stage set is one of the best they’ve ever done.
Dom - I had to restart cause my chromecast fucked up. But I’m good.
James - Christian's glasses!
Dom - Might be 5 seconds behind. No hassles.
Simon - Absolutely loved this Wrestlemania.
Ross - Christian is a belter here. Brilliant heel.
Pete - I rate Edge’s blue look. Very groovy.
Ross - PYRO! Man I miss pyro.
Simon - I miss pyro. Aha beat me to it!
Pete - I always wondered how they did the shooting star pyro.
Simon - Bubba Ray looks vexed.
Ross - If you miss pyro you’re gonna love AEW!
James - Alan Partridge would tell you Pete.
Simon - And we’re off!
Dom - “Dudleyville, the home of Big Daddy Dudley”.
James - Sorry. Missed the start slagging off Taker somewhere else.
Simon - Ladder already in the ring!
Ross - First use of a ladder after 30 seconds, love that.
Pete - I’m a little distracted by the Hardys legitimate matching gimp gear.
Dom - Matt Hardy’s top is a bit like a BDSM rugby top.
Simon – Delete, delete, delete!
Dom - Got the hoops.
Simon - Ouch, that looked painful.
Ross - If you wear fetish gear, you have to expect a ballbusting!
James - Matt is wearing a knock off Dennis the Menace shirt from the Market?
Pete - I can only hear the crowd chant as ‘you deserve it’ there. It’s all NXT’s fault.
Simon - Matt’s bollocks are sore.
Ross - Using the chair like Sabu. His legacy lives on!
James - Are the Dudleys in this?
Pete – Apparently!
Dom - His legacy lives on. He had a WWE run 4 years after this.
Pete - This has been all Hardys and Dudleys so far.
Simon - They already need a breather…
James - Here they come!
Ross - WAZZZZZUP!
Simon - Remember when that was cool?
Pete - Christian if I remember correctly does nothing but eat tons of shit in this match. He’s excellent at it!
Ross - Now there’s a fetish, Pete!
Simon - Loud pop for table!
Pete - Edge clearly has invisible old man balls because D-Von was about a foot from his crotch there on Wassup!
James - 1 Table Broken.
Dom - The event omega is one of the most painful moves I ever experienced in backyard wrestling at my parents. One of my pals came off the roof for it though.
Ross - Jeez! Edge took that like a champ!
Dom - Surely that was much worse on Jeff?
Pete - Yeah. Jeff’s neck!
Dom - All the force through the back of his head.
James - I love the backstory on Big Daddy Dudley and that is how the Dudley's know how to use tables.
Dom - Bubba Ray was undisputedly my most hated wrestler in the world here.
James - Erm, Triple H?
Dom - Condoms stop Dudleys!
Pete - I wonder how Big Daddy Dudley’s construction company is doing nowadays? I would imagine he lost everything in the 2008 financial crisis. Then drank himself to a miserable end.
Ross - 3 ladders brawl!
Ross - BALLS! Christian does eat shit, did you see that?
Simon - Oh my word!
Pete - Look at Christian go!
Simon - I felt that bump from here - poor Christian!
Pete - Nice camera shot there.
Simon - He did well to land like that!
James - Heyman makes matches seem so good.
Ross - What would Cornette say about someone taking that bump and then setting up a table 30 seconds later?
Pete - That top of the ladder camera needs to make a return.
Ross - ACID DROP!
James - 2nd table broken.
Dom - Signs that would be confiscated in 2019: “SUCK ME BEAUTIFUL”
James - Classic American Pie, almost the opening line isn't it?
Pete – Dude, that was like a Marufuji move by Spike there.
James - I sense a GORE. 3 tables broken.
Pete - Shiranui into an ace crusher.
Ross - Rhyno being destructive, whilst wearing crushed velvet.
Pete - Gooooorreeee!
Dom - Oh yes!!! The coolest full arm dragon twist of all time!
Simon - Hi Lita!
Ross - Oh wow, this is the best run in ever? So much going on!
Simon - This is too much, I keep writing and deleting.
James - Lita has killed Spike!
Ross - HOLY SHIT THAT CHAIR SHOT TO SPIKE!
Simon - FUCK ME.
James - 3D on topless Lita!
Ross - So much chaos!
Simon - I love this match.
Pete - Bye, Lita...
Ross - "Everyone is a victim in TLC".
Simon - Look at the fans getting scared!
Dom - Lita’s shirt gets stuck on a ladder. Completely ruins a spot later. See it there when Jeff is setting up the ladder? You can’t not look at it!
James - 4 and a bit tables broken.
Ross - That was a BAD view of the Hardy swanton - looked great on replay though.
Simon - Really bad.
Pete - He does it again many years later when they return and win the belts in Orlando.
Dom - I was always obsessed with the maths of the ladder heights as a kid. The ones in the ring are the exact same height as the one on the outside.
Pete - Why are there short ones? Just to screw with people?
Ross - This is basically Gladiators at this point...
James - Random Gladiators contestant names and facts are is one of my specialities! Anybody remember when that bloke, Robert I think his name was had his pants pulled down during Hang Tough?
Dom - The infamous botched frogger spot. They reckon Jeff tried it a half dozen times in practice and missed it every time but insisted. Luckily, they hit the giant spear perfectly.
Ross - That would have been such a cool spot.
Pete - Oh here we go… it’s coming!
Ross - THE CRAZIEST SPOT EVER?
Pete - Definitely the best AHHH MY GAWWWD ever!
James - 8 and a bit Tables down.
Ross - First holy shit chant of the match… hard to please!
Pete - Inaugural Smackdown live tag team champ, Heyman. A tag team specialist if you will…
Simon - Hahaha Rhyno!
James – IT’S OVER
Ross - Rhyno basically won that, forgotten in time. What an insane match!
Simon - They’re all thinking “how did we survive that?"
Pete - It’s quite an underwhelming finish to that carnage.
James - Rhyno accounted for 5 of the 8 and a bit table spots!
Ross - Great stats.
James - And climbed the ladder. Definitely MVP.
Simon - Rhyno played a big part in this match. Unsung hero.
James - That’s not a hint for anyone to pick an MVP match by the way!
NERD RATINGS
ROSS - Absolute belter, that. Yes, it is car crash and yes the psychology is almost entirely handwaved, but this is a classic for a reason. 9 out of 10.
SIMON - When you mention the letters TLC this match is the first thing that springs to mind. It had huge pops, spots and bumps! You could see the chemistry between the three tag teams flowing throughout the match. Credit to everyone involved I really don’t know how they all made it out without serious injury! 9/10
JAMES - Quick and exciting hits one after the other. I will score that as the h2o album Faster Than The World. Actually called F.😭.W but apparently T then a dot then a T becomes that bloody emoji and I can't stop it happening.
DOM - Haven’t watched this match for a great deal of years but I reckon my mate’s and I watched it 100 times when we were in year 9. I could have still called every move for you before it happened. Nothing has changed. It was my favourite Wrestlemania match then and it probably still is now. 5 Spanish Flies.
PETE - It’s still freaking amazing and hasn’t aged one bit. Everyone comes out of this looking like an absolute beast. Not as dangerous as I remember outside of the spear and swanton but that’s perhaps what’s important! A great great commentary performance as well helps top it off. The wrestling equivalent of a nice lasagna,
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